i don't actually know what i would want to say anyways. people that have come and gone in my life...seen in the rearview mirror of my memory as time continues to drag us apart. signposts along a path once so familiar that i've never actually looked where i was going....so how did i get here? are things well? well enough. but not good. not bad, but not good. seems like i don't remember what defines good or bad anymore, only what is. is that a sign of aging, or apathy? youth remembered is not youth lived, but while i recall my youth, i don't think i was ever young. naive? of course. innocent? briefly. good? well, did i mention naive? does one ever wonder where this is meant to go? was i supposed to have said yes? no? pushed? held on? let go? are regrets the same as curiousity? life is a choose your adventure book...but will you turn the page?

time...passes with very little regard of my trials and tribulations. judges not, but merely observes. disjointed from disuse, i can feel the stirrings of my mind and fingers struggle to link thoughts to action. my thoughts, like my body thrives on conflict. grows from action. sheds rust from use. yet i allow myself to wallow in periods of disinterest. why? even the act of asking that question seems to tire me beyond reason. so i will have to limber myself with exercises long discarded by neglect. excuse the rambling nature of this post, for how can i stretch without first warming up? my mind will first have to walk before i run...but most importantly, i have felt the heat from the flame again. and the flame is in my heart, so perhaps the thoughts can join once more from the many trickles of thought into a torrent of epiphanies once again. we will see.